Hu Liu blushed when a young man came up to ask for her phone number.
Dressed in a Chinese gown, with delicate makeup, Hu sat quietly in her chair,
a little out of place in the bustling atmosphere inside the hall.
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A couple play a game during a group dating
event held in Hangzhou, capital of Zhejiang Province, last month. [China
Daily]
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She timidly answered the man's questions. Beside her at the same table, a
young woman was animatedly discussing dinner plans for that evening with a man.
Hu, 26, an introverted single Beijinger and taking part for the first time in
a group dating session with 699 people available for marriage, was not quite
accustomed to the event.
Hu, a budget accountant with the China State Construction Engineering
Corporation, is obviously not a social animal. "I am at the age to seriously
think of marriage," she said, "but it's hard for me to meet and get to know
guys."
There are few young men in her company and she stays home in her spare time.
She has seen several guys introduced by her colleagues, but they never met
again after the first date.
"People always have a certain purpose in one-to-one dating," Hu said. "If
they find the person is not their type, they won't waste any time."
That's why she tried the group dating session held by the Beijing Municipal
Women's Federation.
"I am less nervous sitting among hundreds of people," Hu said. "I like the
easy atmosphere."
The activity, held over weekends, is the biggest the federation has ever
organized, but it pales compared with some others.
On April 22, 12,658 people took part in a group date in Ningbo of Zheijiang,
and nearly 10,000 showed up for one in Shanghai on May 20.
The agencies charge each participant 10-150 yuan (US$1.25-US$18.75) for
entrance tickets to parks, food and drink, and other expenses including files on
each participant.
"We don't make money out of the participants, but from sponsorship from
studios, hotels and marriage service companies," said Xu Xiaoming, organizer of
a 10,000-people dating event in Nanjing, the capital of Jiangsu Province.
Xu said that companies sponsoring the group dates were aiming at potential
customers for their products and services.
Wu Xiuping, former vice-chairman of the women's federation, said more than
300 couples have tied the knot since the federation began to organize such
activities three years ago.
The great popularity of group dating is no surprise since there are nearly 1
million single, young and available urban residents in Beijing and Shanghai,
most of whom are well-educated, white-collar workers.
"Frequently working overtime under pressure has isolated young people in the
metropolises, leaving them no time to make friends and communicate with the
world outside their companies," Wu said.
In the activity Hu took part in, participants were divided into 41 teams. In
each team, everyone had one minute to stand up and introduce themselves to the
others, and some of them were asked by the compere to sing a song or tell a
story to break the ice. Then all 700 people could ask for a phone number. Hu had
three requests.
Hu hadn't decided who was her Mr Right, but she said her ideal other half is
a man who's not afraid to share his feelings with her.
Another female participant was less fortunate than Hu.
Ren Qun, a 28-year-old civil servant, who holds a master's degree in business
administration, had quit early because she wasn't interested in the men at her
table. Nevertheless, Ren believes the activity is a "good and safe way to make
friends," compared with gatherings arranged by some private dating agencies.
Ren had tried some "private dating clubs" where dozens of singles meet each
weekend to discuss certain topics together.
"People can get a clearer impression of each other at those clubs," Ren said.
"However, it's not easy to know the real background of the participants."
That's also why she doesn't want to look for a boyfriend on the Internet.
Ren said she trusted the activities organized by institutions like the
women's federation as the organizers check the participants' resumes with their
ID card numbers and other documents to verify their identities and backgrounds.
"I'll ask my single female friends to come together next time," Ren said.
Wu Xiuping said it seems group dating is especially popular with women.
"Women have to study and work harder to succeed in society; therefore, many
girls have missed the best time for husband hunting," Wu said, adding that about
60 per cent of the registered members of the organization's dating activities
were female.
A survey of 4,000 single middle class women found 57 per cent hoped to marry
before 30, and only 5 per cent preferred to stay single. Two-thirds cited
difficulties of finding an appropriate man, and most said they felt lonely.
Hu said she often feels bored during the weekends when there is nothing to do
but watch TV or surf the Internet at home.
"I'm afraid I'll forget how to talk to people if I do that much more," Hu
said, forcing a smile.
Although not optimistic about its success rate, she expects group dating to
breathe fresh air into her life.
"At least," she said, "I can make some female friends who are like me."
(China Daily 08/25/2006 page1)
